Funny Birthday Poems
Great funny birthday poems don’t just give birthday boys and girls a BIG laugh — they also leave them with a BIG smile that can last all day. How do you know if what you’re reading is indeed a “great” funny poem? Generally speaking, it depends. It depends on your sense of humor. It also depends on the funny bone of the birthday boy and girl. So, I would say that it depends on, like most decisions in life, striking a fine balance.If you really want to know what makes poetry appropriately funny for someone’s special day of the year, be sure to read Message Guy Tip #74 right below.But if you’re ready to make your choice, take a moment or two to look at the poetry on this page — you’ll find lots of BIG laughs and even BIGGER smiles here.
Message Guy Tip #74:How to select funny birthday poems…
Funny birthday messages, like birthday wishes, birthday quotes, birthday poems and birthday toasts, are only funny if they make the ones you love laugh at themselves in a certain way. What way?
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A birthday message is only funny for birthday girls and boys if it gets them to laugh at themselves in a way that makes them feel special, appreciated and respected. Not an easy feat. As with most humor, the impact of your funny birthday wish rests more with its recipient than you. Just because you think a birthday wish is funny does not make it funny for the birthday boy or girl — or vice versa. For this reason, the three rules of thumb for picking great funny birthday messages are as follows: Rule #1: You must think it’s funny, not offensive.
Rule #2: You think anyone would find it funny, not offensive.
Rule #3: You think the birthday boy or girl would find it funny, not offensive.
On this page and the next two, you’ll find a wide choice of funny birthday poems. Some may not be suitable for you, the birthday boy or girl and/or anyone, for that matter. Some may only be suitable for you and nobody else. But if you follow these three rules of thumb for any type of humor — from family-friendly to adult fare, you will definitely find the right funny birthday poems with the right dose of humor. The key here is to use discretion. Don’t just pick any message — choose carefully, after some consideration. For a little help in determining what’s truly funny, click here to read What is comedy and what makes something funny? (a great article I found online for you). Bottom line: Select funny birthday poems that best bring out your sense of humor and genuinely tickles the funny bone of the birthday girl or boy. This is a insult-free zone.
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BEAUTY AND THE BOTOXBy Message Guy
Happy birthday!You may look a little older,Sadly youth doesn’t come cheap,So skip all those Botox parties,And just get your beauty sleep.Be glad you’re young at heart,And still look as good as gold,Too bad you’re not a millionaire,And can’t put your looks on hold.
BELATEDBy Message Guy
This birthday wish may be late,And it may be over in a flash, But its message is good anytime,Because it comes with lots of cash.A belated happy birthday!
THE PERFECT GIFTBy Message Guy
I knew this gift would make you smile,It’s perfect for your many adventures,Now you can take a bite out of life,With a pair of brand-new dentures.Happy birthday, old fart!
ROCK STARBy Message Guy
Happy birthday to you!You live like a rock star,Singing songs forever sung,You move like Mick Jagger,But sound like William Hung.
BITE MEBy Message Guy
Happy birthday!I don’t want to burst your bubble,Yet it’s time to tell you the truth,You may still have your own teeth,But you’re getting long in the tooth.
MIDNIGHT PIZZABy Message Guy
Happy birthday!You’re still a teenager at heart,Eating in your bed is routine,Early-bird dinners are not your style,Midnight pizza is more your scene.No one has a right to call you old,You can still pass for middle aged,All your parts hurt but still work,With the right nip, tuck and dosage.You have never looked so young,Your head’s still hairier than your ears,Your arms don’t jiggle like Jello,And zits still reduce you to tears.
Still seeking the perfect poem?Find more funny birthday poems below…
SO WHATBy Message Guy
Happy birthday!So what if you’re a little bit older,So what if you ache from head to toe,So what if your ears are full of hair,So what if you got no get up and go. So what if you have laugh lines,So what if you have arms of Jello,So what if you suddenly feel decrepit,Your decrepitude started long ago!
GETTING RIPEBy Message Guy
Today is your birthday,And you feel pretty good,Your body’s still working,You should really touch wood. Your hair is just a bit grey,Your wrinkles few and far between,You may not look 18 anymore, Still you get pimples like a teen. I’m glad you feel as fresh as ever,Despite the fact you’re getting ripe,You say you have 20/20 vision,Yet you read books with large type.In your mind’s eye you’re still young,But your vigour is up for debate,It doesn’t really matter anyhow,You still get the senior discount rate.
SOME-TIMERSBy Message Guy
Another milestone birthday is here,And your precious brain still stirs,You imagine yourself Albert Einstein,But you think like Keith Richards.You don’t have Alzheimer’s,Just “some-timers” all your own,Sometimes you remember,Sometimes you just don’t.You remember you forgot something,But can’t remember what you forgot,Start to plan your own surprise party,If your mind goes any more to pot.
ZERO TO 60By Message Guy
May you be granted no memory,Of the people you wished took a hike,May your luck hold out for decades,Bringing you only the folks you like,May your eyes never fail you,When you need to tell the difference,May your walker go from zero to 60,So you could stay at a safe distance.
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